Thoughts/Observations After Watching Football All Weekend

First let me say thanks to those of you who contributed to the reader input post. As a result of your requests, the following will now be staples here at the website:

1.) Pictures of me wearing clothes
2.) Videos of me in the shower
3.) People doing monkey stuff
4.) In-depth Cricket coverage
5.) Photos of my poop

Ask and you shall receive.


Moving on. Here's some things I thought of while watching football all weekend in the order they originally came to me:

1.) Hey Howie Long. Stop making fun of strangers for not having Chevy trucks. You snarky bastard. How furious would you be if something like this were to happen to you in real life? Well I take it back. You'd probably be too confused to be angry. Example:

Me (sitting in traffic in my non-Chevy truck): Come on! Move people!

Howie Long taps on my window. I roll my window down.

Me(shocked, confused): Howie Long?

Howie: Hows your gas mileage?

Me: Excuse me?

Howie: Mine's better. My engine's bigger too.

Me: Where did you come from anyway? Did you just abandon your truck in the middle of traffic to come harass me?

Howie: Nice manicure. Doosh.

Me: What the?- It's not a manicure dammit! Stop making fun of me Howie Long! Christ, get out of here! Broken Arrow was cool but Firestorm fucking sucked!



You see? You'd be shocked wouldn't you. Shocked and hurt.

I have to take back that Firestorm knock though. I lost my temper and said something I didn't mean. It happens.








2.) Why are all the talking heads insisting that Edgerrin James and the Cards running game is suddenly a factor? It's still no good. The team numbers:

vs. ATL: 28 car, 86 yds, 3.1 avg.

vs. CAR: 43 car, 145 yds, 3.4 avg.

The second game was a little better, but most of that was in garbage time against a team that had already quit.

3.) Joe Flacco is just ok. One day he may be good. Even very good. Right now? He's just ok. So everybody just chill out on the Flacco boner.

4.) Geico. I am calling out your head of advertising. What is this money-with-the-googly eyes shit you're peddling? It's not funny. At all. You think just because you made one, maybe two funny ads about some fucking cavemen that you can wake up hungover and throw together some ad campaign about a stack of dollar bills with fucking googly eyes, add some techno music, and everyone will lap it up like it's hilarious! Try harder dammit! I have no respect for anyone who enjoys these commercials. It reminds me of this:




5.)
This fucking guy pisses me off. Why? Come on. Just look at him. I bet he pisses you off too. I thought it was impossible to make T.G.I. Fridays more obnoxious and less appetizing. I was wrong. Mission Accomplished.


That is all.